It's a funny feeling to be friends with an ex you never quiet completely got over. It's calming, in the sense that she is still back in your life. Because you both have this very strong connection that worked perfect when in a romantic relationship and works perfect in a friendship as well.
I've figured out how i get over people. At first i thought it was my way of dealing with crushes but it just hit me that it's "my way" of getting over people. It's not going and finding someone new, or having a one night stand, or sending them hate mails, smses etc. (maybe like a one time thing, not everyday), not revenge.
It's actually rubbing it in my face that does it. It worked on the 2 crushes i had before my last relationship, where i kept crushing on her till i told her, and when she told me it won't work (happened to both cases) and asked if she should disappear, i told her no. and talked to her and acted like i had nothing for her and just let time pass till one day it's completely gone and it's back to normal friendship again. It's a lot harder to do if you were actually in a relationship with her, because i would need that time alone first, and then go to being friends, and slowly but surely get over her as a lover and embrace her as a friend. This finally feels right :)
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6 comments:
I hope you don't take this the wrong way...I dont mean to be rude or anything...I just want to know when you say romantic involment with a woman and you talk about your ex-lover, do you mean like having full lebian sex with her. And how does that opproutinty avail you in a strict country like Saudi Arabia ??
Anonymous: yes i do mean that. it happened to me outside of saudi. but it happens in saudi. there are a lot there :D welcome to the blog
i think I agree with your theory, that having the people around would be better. But people break up with emotional baggage, they can't handle the pain etc and want to forget their ex existed!
Vixen: yeah. the reason why you need time first alone before coming back as friends would be because of emotional baggage. i completely understand what u mean by forgetting wanting to completely forget about their exs. how are you Vixen? :D
Girl, I find your blog by accident and I absolutely love it.
I read your post about how you get over an ex-lover. I am in the same boat. Ironically he's Saudi also (From Riyadh). I'm American. I fell hard for him in such a short time, and when it ended, I felt crushed (I've been in love in the past and was in a 3 year relationship, but the heart break for some reason wasn't as bad as this current one:-( ). He's tried to contact me to "be friends" and says he "misses me a lot"....but it's just too painful to just BE FRIENDS when I feel so much more still.
I hope you feel better soon and as sassy as you are, I am sure there are plenty of girls that will be lucky to have a chance with you ;-)
Eastern Reflections: Welcome to the blog! i completely understand. it's very hard. the friends part. it takes a long time before you actually bear to seem him as a friend but it is doable. the problem is that it's very hard to keep just as friends because it triggers stuff from before. the stuff that triggers are the ones that are hard to deal with because u'll be soo tempted to follow them but you push them aside and just go with it. then it eases up. trust me on that one.
*hugs* i hope you also feel better soon!
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